The Dangers of Sexual abuse Misinterpretation

Sexual abuse is presented to us as something very “black and white”. By this, I mean that sexual abuse is described and painted as someone kidnapping you down the street and taking advantage of you by imposing unwanted sex, including penetration. This is the image we have in our minds about sexual abuse. This partly incorrect vision may seem like something we can ignore, however, it is the root of sexism and sexually violent behaviors by men and sometimes, normalized pedophilia. It makes us look over sexual abuse in minors. This article will go over the harms of misinterpretation of such abuse, and the signs to look out for if a child has been sexually abused.

 

Statistics say that approximately one in three women is taken advantage of sexually. The question is do these women understand what sexual abuse is? If victims knew what is defined as sexual abuse, there would probably be more recognized victims. Those who abuse women do not categorize or like to categorize themselves as “abusers” because societies do not define other behaviors that do not rape as abuse or inappropriate. As a society, we have normalized extreme abnormal behaviors that are sexually violent towards women, or impose sexual power over young girls; because we define sexual violence as rape only, look over victims, and do not reprimand, or educate potential abusers.

Moreover, according to rapecrisis.org.uk, almost 87% of sexual abuse cases are carried out by someone the victim knows, making the extreme vision and being-kidnapped-on-the-street scenario very unrealistic and unrepresentative.

This also affects the reports imposed by men. Legally, rape alludes to penetration. Since not many men who report abuse are penetrated, this can give them a disadvantage in court as well. We must categorize other types of sexual abuse.

For example, as a young girl, I have always encountered a lot of pedophilia. I have been asked by teachers “what I think about sex” when I was only 14 years old. I have also been looked at inappropriately by teachers or been told that I would be more attractive to them if “I was not flat-chested”. Young women also tend to believe that they are attractive because men approach them or they think these men like them when they are presenting inappropriate behaviors with hints of abuse of power. Some of these older men that interact with children (such as teachers) tend to sexualize minors and children or see them as a sexual targets. This attitude is categorized as micro sexism, it seems small but it is the root of sexual abuse and what gives confidence to these men for them to take advantage of women, or throw around inappropriate commentary. It is important that young women know that this is the painful truth it is just very normalized and never talked about.

It is crucial that we look out for inappropriate looks, comments regarding sexuality or appearance, or how attractive you look in a professional setting because it is not normal. As children, we tend to believe professionals and adults know better than us and treat us fairly, but this is not the case and it is difficult to come to terms with.

What are the signs of Sexual abuse in children?

 Children who are victims of sexual abuse often do not find the words to explain their experience, mostly because the groomer or perpetrator warns or tells them to make it their little secret. Still, despite not talking about it, here are some common signs you may notice in such children:

• A sudden change of self-esteem.
• A sudden interest in sexual intercourse that wasn’t there or fixation with it.
• Sexual knowledge or vocabulary.

In conclusion, if you observe these signs, it is important to talk to them about it and assure them they can trust you with anything. If needed, you can take them to see a physiologist.

Written by: Laura Gray