The Impact of Miscarriage on Women and ways to cope with it
Miscarriage is pregnancy loss that happens earlier than 20 weeks of pregnancy. It happens in one out of five recognized pregnancies, and one in ten women experience a miscarriage in their lifetime. Women experience different emotions after a miscarriage; it all depends on the circumstances around the pregnancy and your personal situations.
Apart from that, a woman usually goes through a range of emotions after losing a baby. The experience can be devastating, as postpartum hormonal and physical changes in the body can contribute to emotional dysregulation. This article shows some of these emotions and ways to cope.
Common Emotions felt after a Miscarriage
Grief
Some grief that comes with a miscarriage is like the loss of a loved one; you have to let go of your baby as well as your dreams of being a parent soon. The late you are in the pregnancy before the event, the more attachment you will have developed with your unborn baby, which worsens the grief.
Guilt
Often, women blame themselves for miscarriages. They may question what they could have done wrong to cause it, even though there is nothing they could have done to prevent it in most cases. This is likely if the cause of the miscarriage is unknown, which leads to confusion and leaves you wondering how you might have contributed to it.
Loneliness
People around you may not always understand the level of your sorrow. They may find it hard to empathize because ‘you never really knew the baby.’ Due to this, you may feel isolated and alone.
Anger
This is a common emotion following a miscarriage. You may feel anger and jealousy when you see pregnant women or families. Children can be reminders of your loss too.
Anxiety
You may experience anxiety and fear about the fate of future pregnancies, resulting in anxiety disorder. Pregnancy loss is known to increase the risk of anxiety and depression.
These emotions are a few common ones. Sometimes you may feel restless; other times, numb; you may also have trouble sleeping and loss of appetite. There is no right or wrong way of responding when recovering from a miscarriage, and every woman has a different experience.
How to Cope with Miscarriage
After losing an unborn baby, it is crucial you know that the waves of emotion you may experience are normal and to be expected. You need to know that recovering from a pregnancy loss is a process that takes time. Allow yourself to grieve. The way to healing is to be compassionate with yourself and let yourself experience your emotions.
Anger and jealousy are totally normal, and you should never beat yourself up about that. Reminding yourself that there is nothing you could have done to avoid the miscarriage helps in dealing with the guilt you may feel. Opening up to your loved ones can be helpful as long as you feel comfortable doing it.
Fathers also experience bereavement after a miscarriage, and they may express their sadness as anger. You need to understand this early on because you and your partner need time to mourn your loss. It is best to keep talking about what you are going through.
Remember that miscarriages are pretty common. If you share your experience with people, you may find many women who had encountered it before you. Knowing you are not alone can be a great source of solace and comfort.
When to get pregnant again?
While trying to get over the loss of a baby, some women try to quickly get pregnant again. If you don’t feel the emotions by interrupting the process, the feelings will likely come back. In addition to that, your body needs time to recover after a miscarriage; the time required is generally a few months till a woman is physically and emotionally ready to get pregnant again.
Finally, if the emotions discussed above interfere with daily life and persist over time, it is best to seek professional help.
Written by: Selam Temesgen M.D.
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