The Unspoken Pressure unmarried Women Experience in the Society

Women who are over thirty-three years old and unmarried often experience undue pressure as a result of societal or traditional expectations. Most communities perceive spinsterhood as a social problem and disgrace, while the west modern communities have a different view about it. There are numerous reasons responsible for a woman to be single; the most common reasons for this are cultural and religious reasons, emotional reasons, educational reasons, and sometimes, personal freedom.

Emotional, Cultural, and Religious Reasons

 Looking from the lenses of emotional reasons, a woman who was in a relationship and was jilted may find it hard to move on and love another man; and rather prefer to be single for the rest of her life.

 For cultural and religious reasons, most cultures and communities look at this group of women as a disgrace and a burden on society. In such societies, a woman has to become a mother by formal marriage and recorded in court. Even if the woman chooses to be a mother outside the traditional setting (wedlock), they are unable to do so to avoid harsh judgments or treatments. 

Educational Reasons

From educational aspects, with more orientation on gender parity and opportunities for the girl child; most spinsters decide to go further in their education and do things that are fulfilling before getting married.  Also, some may desire to be free of family obligations, hence choosing to stay single.

Apart from all the above reasons, some may choose not to be mothers, or get married without any reason.

Reasons for High rate of Spinsterhood in Syria

Spinsterhood is a widespread phenomenon that women encounter, especially in developing countries. For example in Syria, over the last years, the number of spinsters keeps increasing. Most of the women want to become mothers, but due to different factors, the majority of them are unable to do so.

High Marriage Expenditures: Firstly, during the war, it was hard for young people to marry and build a new family because the marriage expenditures cost an arm and a leg. Moreover, the house's rent is expensive, and there is little to no job available for them. Also, due to the huge immigration of young men in the country, the number of females is now larger than males.

Education: Education in Syria including the universities is free of charge, females from all backgrounds have the opportunity to study and complete higher degrees. Studying and raising a family at once can be tasking, as a result, there might be an increase in the number of a spinster in society.

* You need to know that this point does not in any form condemn the importance of gender parity and opportunities to further one’s education*.

 

What is the way forward for spinsters living in Syria?

 Despite being unmarried, some women still want to be mothers, and putting in mind that there is a peak to a woman’s fertility, there is a need to consider all options. How do we do that?

Oocyte cryopreservation (eggs freezing) is a great method to encourage single women to become mothers when they want to. Although this technique is expensive and most people cannot afford it; however, social charities and organizations that believe in the essence of life preservation can support women who need financial support.

Technically, this process has many arguments in many counties due to religious and cultural reasons; which say that the fertilization for the oocyte must be by the sperm of a legal husband. It is crucial to induce the government to support this and give encourage such women even without a formal marriage.

Also, to provoke the marriage and facilitate for Syrian youths to marry whom they love, people should minimize the dowry to achieve their girl’s goal, reduce the increasing number of spinsters, and consider the economic status in the society.

In conclusion, spinsterhood is not a disgrace for the communities and we should encourage people to be open-minded and understand the situation;  work on finding a way to give spinsters who hope to be mothers the chance, and let others who want to stay single be without social pressure.

Written by: Taha Al. zahran